Wednesday, August 4, 2010


God, grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change;

Courage to change the things I can;

And wisdom to know the difference.

I was watching a TV show I happen to adore and one of the main characters recited this poem to his friend, telling her his father always had it up on the fridge despite not having ever touched a drop of alcohol, it was just because he liked it. I didn't know this poem was used by the members of Alcohols Anonymous and other step programs, but just like the characters father I too like the poem. There's just something about it that while reading makes you feel like any obstacle can be overcome. Whether it be by your acceptance of it being there, or by moving it yourself.

When he read the poem, the first thing that came to my mind was when I found out I wasn't going to get financial aid for college. I was devastated. I was heart broken. I worried my friends and family because all I did for days was isolate myself. This poem defines just what exactly was going through my head, what's still going through my head. I accept that I cannot change my financial status, but there are so many things I can do instead, I just need the courage to do them. I think I'm going to tape this to my mirror so that every morning while staring at myself bleary-eyed in the mirror my eyes can skim over it and know that while things are unstoppable in this world, many many things are changeable. Many things we can overcome, we can change. We just need to be strong and courageous enough to change them.

It was so very scary and hard to change my college last minute. Not only am I a college newbie, I didn't know if I had the strength to go through it all again with another college. The applications, the emails, the phone calls, the financial aid, the letters in the mail, the accounts, etc. I had been boosted on the excitment for the first college, but now that it had all went down hill I was wary and didn't want to find myself blindly falling off a cliff like last time. But I knew what had to be done. I wanted an education badly enough that I packed away my fears and boldly got myself in gear. I am now fully enrolled in my states community college (all gen ed classes, I still plan on transferring to my original college) and all this has taught me that sometimes you take a road that ends up being a dead end half way through your journey, or has a bridge closed down so you can't pass, but that doesn't mean there aren't ways around it.

Our world is run by dreams, ideas, thoughts, and those people wouldn't have these wonderful businesses or be successful if they hadn't either accepted some things that have happened to them, or changed those that needed to be changed. As I get older I realize this, and while there's sometimes cloudy rainy days scheduled ahead, the sunny days with beautiful clouds filling the sky are right behind them.

Without bad how would we know what good is? And vise versa. I can handle what gets thrown at me, as long as I continue to stay strong.

God, grant me the serenity...


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